Are you a stressed out mother? Always in a hurry? Feel pressure to keep going, planning, doing, etc.? Do you always have multiple things on your mind at once? Wish you could be a better mother for your kids? Wish you could have more time for yourself? If so, you're not alone. And you're probably not in a very good mood most of the time because of all the pressure you're under. We all know that when mom's in a bad mood, the whole family gets affected.
Now that you're back at work, chances are you are working even harder at juggling all the bits and pieces of your life and you may be getting exhausted and discouraged in the process.
Good news. There's a way to deal with this. You don't have to just wait till your children are grown up in order to be in control of your life and have some free time. You can enjoy their childhood as well as your busy mommy life right now.
Let's face it, when we have lots to do, we need things to run smoothly and efficiently. We need a tidy house, a cooperative spouse, helpful colleagues, and preferably less traffic on the road. Hence, we get impatient with our children for throwing their toys all over the floor and yet again, annoyed at our husbands for leaving their things lying about, resentful that the precious free time on weekends is spent doing pending housework or visiting relatives. We snap at our colleagues for not meeting deadlines and delaying our work. We feel discouraged when the boss asks us to stay overtime because we want to say no but we cannot. We look at other mothers and wonder how they're doing it so much better than us. In the end, we feel we are never enough.
What if you were to take some deep breaths and s.l.o.w. down? In fact, how about doing it right now? If you are racing through this article, stop. Think about what you're reading.
You're probably thinking how can I slow down? There's so much stuff to do all the time. I can't just let everything slide. I have to work and manage the household as well. You're right. You can't just sit back, relax and not do things.
We're not saying stop being productive. We're saying SLOW DOWN. Whatever you are doing, whether it's putting clothes in the washing machine, reading a story to your child, packing a lunch box, do it in a less frantic way. Stop trying to make everything go as quickly as possible so that you can move on to the next. That would be a never-ending race.
Instead, be mentally present and enjoy whatever task you're doing. You can still be fast and efficient. We're talking about slowing down on the INSIDE.
Take a moment to grasp this concept.
Slowing down means being productive and peaceful at the same time. Write this on a post-it note and stick it on your fridge or in your handbag. Did you know that you can be busy and calm at the same time? This is what you need to aim for. Go ahead and plan, organize, make your to-do lists. But when you're doing a task, be mentally present. Avoid thinking of the next 10 things you need to do. They're going to be there whether you stress out about them or not.
Slowing down means picking your child up when she holds out her arms and holding her for as long as she wants even if it means dinner gets a little delayed. It means putting away your smart phone and paying attention to what your child is saying. It means playing a game when your child asks instead of folding that pile of laundry or looking at your emails. It means reading one more bedtime story. It means choosing to do something for yourself before doing that next chore.
It's a given that you're going to be busy as a working mother. Instead of flying through your days, embrace the chaos. Better yet, be cheerful about it. This is your life right now. Choose to savour it slowly.
Imagine how much your family stands to gain if you were a happier mother. How would your husband and kids react if they experienced you less frantic and stressed?
Best of all, imagine how much YOU stand to gain.
Slow down your inner self and choose to be a happier mother today.